just found out that husband of only a few months has a daughter by another woman. I am pregnant with our own child and have so many emotions...I don't know what to think or do...anybody else been through this?Anyone ever found out that their husband had another child shortly into your marriage?
Well, at least he knows. Many a married couple has been wiped out financially when their assets get suddenly frozen when the husband gets hit with a retroactive child support order on a child that he never knew existed. This is why a woman needs to do a detailed study of all past sexual encounters, including oral sex, he had with any females. Oral sex and condoms does not prevent pregnancy, as the woman can still use it to impregnate herself, as a Florida Doctored learned the hard way.
A 27 year old married man was hit with 14 years of retroactive child support from the woman who was his sitter when he was 12 years old.
As for you issue, there's not much to do about it, now. Your child needs a father, as does the other child. How it will affect your family finances is another matter. States are considering the use of spousal income in child support calculations to reduce the number of modifications being awarded when men get laid off.
Here's a few things you will need.
http://tinyurl.com/StepFamilies
http://tinyurl.com/ChildSupportModificat鈥?/a>
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/Dad鈥?/a>
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\Anyone ever found out that their husband had another child shortly into your marriage?
Wow. How did you find out? Was it him confessing?
You don't need me to tell you this is a complicated mess. I'd lose all respect for a man who didn't make an effort to be in his child's life, but then if he happened to be my husband, this would create big changes in my own life and that of any kids I had.
I don't even know what to say. This is a betrayal on every level, and to be honest I don't know if I could get past it. I'd probably try to make a go of it, but I'd definitely tell him that the 2 of you need good couples counseling, and this would not be presented as a request. If he refused, then I'd probably walk away. I can't imagine hiding something like this from my partner and it obviously leads to questions about what else might be out there.
Gah....I'm sorry this happened to you.
Many years ago I had a coworker I was very close with. She had a happy marriage, and a little baby boy. After some time, she noticed her husband was bringing home less money, and made a funny comment on that looking like child support. But it turned to be right. He was working in another city, and one night, went to a party, met a woman, slept with her, and she got pregnant. She didn't want an abortion, so they had a baby girl out of marriage. My friend was very sad, upset, didn't know what to do. At last, she forgave him. The daughter was accepted and it never happened again. But it hurt her... Do what you consider is going to work better to you. He didn't tell you the truth. Why?
if this child didn't come about as a result of him being unfaithful to you he has alot of explaining to do as to why he didn't tell you before you were married about this other child. if he hasn't been unfaithful, take your time to make any decisions, pregnancy can mess with your feelings, it is something you could get over but only with total honesty
how old is the other daughter?
If the child is a newborn then that means he was unfaithful and if its an older child, older than your relationship, then you will have to love and accept this
or you can find it as a means to leave him
If he knew before the marriage that he had a child and didn't tell you, I would be very angry. I might even consider divorce. If he didn't know, then I would also be wondering if he has any other child about.
if he knew, then there is a problem. But if he didnt, then theres nothing that can be done.
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